YouTube is my parenting tool

Since I am the proud mother of a 10-year-old boy (Pes), I have begun to learn a few things about boys in general. I grew up in a house with a sister, and have almost exclusively girl cousins, so I just didn't grow up with boys. Having friends and schoolmates who are boys is one thing, living with them is quite another. One thing I have learned is: they are not big on discussing feelings. If, for example, I were to ask Zsa Zsa or Eva to elucidate the finer points of emotion stratification vis-a-vis friendship disappointment, school stress, or an unsuccessful shopping expedition, we would be here for days. Boys, not so.

There are other differences as well. Pes would be happy if I were not so cognizant of his personal hygiene. We had a discussion on the topic this summer and he said, "Oh, I don't need that (meaning, hygiene). I'm going to be one of those guys who sits on the couch all day eating cheese puffs. I'll be a cheesepuffologist like Rat (see Pearls Before Swine)." OK, then.

Lately, in honor of the upcoming Rosh Hashana holiday, I have been taking stock of my life and trying to institute some improvements. I'm sure you can guess that one of these is to (ding ding ding you guessed it) be a better mother. This evening, I parlayed my resolution into an activity I thought we could all enjoy--It's called watching stuff on YouTube.

It started when I noticed that Zsa Zsa and Pes had begun some sort of synchronized hand clapping/dance thingamajig and what's the first thing I thought of? Of course, Ross and Monica's dance routine, Dick Clark's Rockin' New Year's Eve, first aired Thurs, Dec 16, 1999. Friends. The TV Show. Keep up, Mother.

So I ran to the computer and was like, "Kids, gather 'round, you have to see this it is SOOO funny!" Any chance to run to the computer and watch something at my house is like feeding raw meat to lions and within seconds, we were all whooping it up with Ross and Monica. They laughed, I laughed, it was great. Then, Pes reminded me that as we were viewing another YouTube video on Rosh Hashana the day before (yes, I know), I got him hooked on "Charlie bit my finger." For those of you who haven't seen this, it is the funniest 56 seconds you will ever see. And it has over 370 MILLION hits so if you haven't seen it yet, I'll give you a second to go do that now.

Good job. We had all had a great laugh, and everyone took turns feeling the scar tissue on my leg. I somberly recounted the war story in which I earned that scar; a two-year-old Gorby biting my leg right through my jean skirt causing a near-fainting episode from the pain. Incidentally, it was Gorby who laughed the absolute hardest at "Charlie bit my finger." Then, it was off to bed.

Around 9 o'clock, Pes came downstairs to say goodnight and since Big Shot Husband was not home yet, I thought this would be a perfect opportunity to gauge how I'm doing as a mother. One thing I always fear is that my kids don't feel loved enough because I can sometimes, once in a while, be a little tad bit critical of them. Knowing that my subject was a 10-year-old boy who wasn't about to give me a lengthy discourse on his psyche, I came up with a clever multiple choice test.

"So, Pes," I said, "Do you feel like I love you?"
"Duh, Mommy, of course," said Pes.
"So, like, if you're at school and you're really upset about something, do you think to yourself:
a) I wish Mommy were here;
b) I can't wait until I can hug Mommy later;
c) I know Mommy loves me; or
d) Charlie Bit My Finger."

Gales of laughter erupted. He shook his head, indicating, I guess, e) None of the above.
"But Mommy," he said, "Today on our field trip when we were doing the pulley thingy when I had to go really high up in the air, I thought to myself, 'My mom would be really proud of me.'" That's all I needed to know.